The inability to curb sexual behaviour can cause substantial distress to emotional health and can have an adverse impact on close intimate relationships.
Sex addicts are unable to control or postpone sexual feelings and actions, with the need for arousal supplanting the need for intimacy. Eventually, thrill-seeking becomes more important than family, career, even personal health and safety.
There is a ritual an addict goes through before acting out on their desires. Often the most pleasurable aspects of acting out sexually is in the preoccupation with the act: the planning, plotting and anticipation what is about to take place. After that, the individual feels shame, despair, and confusion. Until the next craving. Then the cycle repeats itself.
Addictive sexuality is like most compulsive behaviour: a destructive twist on a normal life-enhancing activity. Defining sex addiction depends less on the behaviour itself than on the person's motivation.
Love addicts go through life with desperate hopes and constant fears. Fearing rejection, pain, unfamiliar experiences, and having little faith in their ability or right to inspire love, they wait and wish for love, perhaps their least familiar real experience.
Signs of Love or Sex Addiction Include:
As Patrick Carnes states, “Contrary to enjoying sex as a self-affirming source of physical pleasure, the sex addict has learned to rely on sex for comfort from pain, for nurturing or relief from stress,” comparable to the alcoholic’s purposeful use of alcohol.
Help and Treatment
You do not need to suffer from sex addiction to seek professional help. If you find yourself acting out sexually, seek professional help early to help reduce the harmful consequences.
Screening - The aim of the initial session is to identify the presence of acting out sexually and/or effect of negative consequences of acting out. Our professional WE CARE counsellors will screen for other existing mental health conditions to gain a deeper understanding of the client.
Assessment - This is a comprehensive understanding of the severity and depth of acting out in the context of the client's life situation. We also evaluate the individual's strengths, weaknesses, problems and needs so we can determine an effective solution. Potential risks, and how they are to be managed, will be integrated into the treatment planning. Otherwise, a suitable treatment plan can proceed, after a discussion with the client, and with his approval.
Treatment Planning + Counselling - The treatment plan is tailored to the client's needs. Immediate and long-term goals are established. A discussion of WE CARE's holistic services is included in the treatment planning.
Your sessions with WE CARE counsellors are strictly private and confidential.
SPLA (Sex Porn Love Addiction) Recovery Programme
The SPLA (Sex Porn Love Addiction) Recovery Programme is a structured therapy programme designed for people with sex, pornography and love addictions. Counselling is provided by trained addiction specialists.
Basic programme components:
Depending on their needs, some clients may require further sessions after the initial phase of the programme.
To find out more about our Sex, Love and Porn addiction counselling programme, click here.
WE CARE has started a new support group called “Family and Friends Support Group”. Facilitated by WE CARE counsellors, this group is meant for spouses, partners, family members or friends affected by an addicted loved one.
"Family & Friends" teaches effective strategies for self-care and how to cope with the recovering addict. The support group focuses on changing the way you interact with the recovering loved one. Using the CRAFT Model and SMART Recovery tools, we will touch on important topics that family members and friends experience, including:
The goals for "Family & Friends" are
"Family & Friends" is scheduled on the 1st and 3rd Thursday of each month, 7pm to 830pm, at WE CARE. The group has been meeting since August 2018 but you can join in at any time.
If you are an affected family member or friend and you wish to attend "Family & Friends", contact Sida at 6547 5459 or NoorSida@wecare.org.sg to register.
SMART stands for Self-Management & Recovery Training. Participants learn tools for addiction recovery based on the latest scientific research and participate in a world-wide community which includes free, self-empowering, science-based mutual help groups. All facilitators are registered SMART Recovery Facilitators.
SMART Recovery Details
Day: Every Thursday
Timing: 300pm to 430pm
Venue: WE CARE, 11 Jalan Ubi
SMART is an ongoing closed group & is catered for individuals with a history of addictions. Interested participants are required to undergo a clinical intake before attending SMART Recovery.
If interested, please email to firstname.lastname@example.org
Mindfulness For Recovery
Mindfulness for Recovery is an open group to learn and practice mindfulness. Mindfulness helps participants to break away from their own destructive habitual patterns. All facilitators have personal experience practising mindfulness. This group is catered for people with a history of addictions, reactive behaviours and/or mood disorders.
Every Friday, 630pm to 730pm
Venue: WE CARE Community Services
To register: call 6547 5459 or email email@example.com